please, have a sit with me.

maybe this is how you learn to be all grown up. you learn to endure something that hurt you so bad. keep unnecessary things for yourself, even though your heart screaming all the way round, just simply it is meaningless stupid feelings. now you have to walk the pain as long as you can, no matter how small the energy left, how bitter every step ahead, how failures hunt you down along the road. 

maybe this is how you learn to be all grown up. realize that something isn't always up to your plan. several plans are better left behind because simply your only choice is to adapt with what universe gave. you accept, you know you are as clueless as fallen leaves in brown tiled city park. now, you laugh the tears. you tasted sour, somehow bitter, but surprisingly sweet in the end. you know, it might be the beginning of an end. a sweet sweet end. you finally laugh without any bargain, because you want to, because all the things that have been such a disaster become foolishly funny.

and yes, this is how you actually learn to be all grown up. you keep, you endure, you adapt, you walk, you laugh, you accept.